PART 6~LOSS OF MY GRANDMA 2014

JUST A FEW PICTURES I GATHERED! Always smiling that beautiful smile πŸ™‚ SONG I WROTE AND SANG AND A GOOD FRIEND DID THE MUSIC

 

http://www.singsnap.com/karaoke/r/bf8d8b547

 

Well as i sit here and wait for the last session of General Conference, my mind wanders about my grandma!.My sweet grandma passed yesterday morning (april 5 2014 ) towards the beginning of  conference and she had some family by her side.As i was hearing/or rather seeing the news i was heart broken.I was like Wow! She is gone.As i am unable to make her funeral next week 😦 i figure this would be great to write and share and be able to keep the memories alive from my point of view.Maybe it will help spark other memories as well.The wonderful woman that i spent many many summers with growing up and had the opportunity to see her again passing through  on the way to up the west coast into  Canada one time and last year when i went to my sister’s place and was able to spend some time with her.I never forgot about grandma.Nor will i ever .I know she has had a wonderful,long life,but still the pain is there.And sometimes you just have to mourn and you can rejoice as well.

Grandma is a beautiful woman inside and out.I see a lot of my grandma’s traits through my own  mother.She is very  caring and loving.She would always help you in any way she could.I hate saying the word “was” as she still is etched in my mind and heart like she is still around .So therefore i will try to say is instead of was.Grandma Citte had a wonderful home that i would stay nights with.My twin charity and i and my mom would stay with her lots growing up.Charity and I would play outside with the toys grandma had and yes she would spoil us with all the treats and candy.It was fun to go outside and get icecream or popsicles and eat them .Sometimes we were lucky to get two! πŸ™‚ there is something special about going to grandma’s house.

(besides the treats of course ,that was the bonus  and plus secrets from my parents ,even though they know lol )

I remember going in the hallway with the  candy dish with my twin and when my twin was somewhere else i would do it .We would gather our pockets full of butterscotch…HAhaha and our mouth had some in it too.We would be sneaky and go outside in a hurry..sure enough grandpa would come home and find that the bowl of candy is gone…Well when he would ask grandma where it was,she “assumed supposedly it was  grandpa”he denied it and yes i told a fib,saying he ate all the candy…Grandma would fill up the bowl again.She told me last year ,she said “you know that the reason i kept filling the bowl up,was because i love spoiling you kids..and i knew you were getting it,why you think it kept getting filled?? She said it was no secret as she loved doing that.Grandma would always smile and talk in a soft voice that was so warming.She never said a bad thing about anyone and loved her kids and grand kids and great grandkids as she would always have a hard time naming them all ..She would i remember growing up would send a bday card with a dollar bill in and and at a certain age you would get like a 5 dollar and so on till she was unable to send anymore.That was alot of cards as she had so many to write.I was so anxious growing up to get that and i would buy an icee with it.She would always say spend it on anything you want.How she loved me so very much.

Grandma knew some of the trials i was taking and we had various talks by phone. I would write her all the time for many years and  call her.I looked forward to that very much.I would send her various gifts as flowers,wooden roses,sweatshirt with  best grandma or something like that and other things just to let her know how wonderful she was.There was so much love i wanted to show her and tell her and just hug her and spend more time with her.I didn’t want to leave last year.I knew she was getting worse and i just didn’t want her to go.None of us did.When you love someone so much you want them to stay forever and ever.Sadly she had to go yesterday.:( I was able to call my twin who sadly was so waiting to see her later this month and my heart breaks for her as i knew it was coming the night before when i seen a post my Uncle bob had made on fb. I was able to call and let my sister Maureen know as well.As it was conference but i was crying, i was alone and no one was around for me to hug so i wanted my sisters near.It was nice to be comforted by them and to hear their voices and that they love me.Maureen would say it was wonderful for grandma to be reunited with grandpa and everyone and she was so sweet to take my call as charity which i love my family so much…As the night before i was getting ready for bed i was praying that she was comfortable and that my family was as well.I was speaking out loud for heavenly father to send her words so she knows how much i love her.I was going to send her flowers as i told Uncle Bob but i was unable and in the morning i seen why.Flowers would’ve made her smile but wouldn’t have stopped her from going.It was her time,she had finished what she had to do on this earth.But the reunion she had with grandpa hardy and mama and everyone else was glorious.I know in my heart that she is in a better place.Grandma will never be forgotten and her love and example is in all of us.I truly love her with all my heart.We all form a special bond with others that aren’t the same.Some are closer than others and that is fine,but we all need each other to help support,guide,lean,and love.

Grandma loved for everyone to smile,feel good and be at peace with one another.She had so much love for everyone especially her children.I was able to hear so many stories about tennis games,singing, help for colleges,when they got married,how they were growing up and etcc..i  could go on and on and i could listen to her all the time.After all these were stories of my mother,aunts and uncles and their families ..Not to mention there were stories of my brothers and sisters.She had stories about everyone .It was great to hear and i still remember some not as well but its there in my heart..I loved the one going to stay with her while my family would backpack in Yosemite and i would be with my mom sometimes my twin and other times she would go somewhere else or went camping..This particular memory it was my mom and I and grandma and grandpa citte.My mom was visiting her sister auntjune and i was helping my grandma with salads and making cookies .My grandpa would get ready for his card game i believe on the patio..

Well as i made cookies my grandma would remind me to save cookie dough for my mom ..hahahha many know you  can’t make cookies without my mom getting the dough first..(that is her trait and i love it πŸ™‚ well grandma would say ‘I don’t know why Anne would do that ,getting all the dough first and eat it..That isn’t good for her..” that is mom grandma i would reply and she would smile and say yes ,and that she would do anything for my mom.She would tell me numerous times how happy my mom was to get us kids and to have all of us kids.Grandma said she even came out a few times to help my mom shortly after we were adopted and she had my youngest brother tony..She wouldn’t let anyone hold Tony..And we were all running wild.Grandma had to get order in the house ,And the sounds of it she did (laugh) She may have spoiled us but she also had us listen too! She told me one time my sister Maureen went to hold tony to help because she was so loving and wanted to help out and lol grandma wouldn’t let her,Grandma said she kind of yelled at Maureen and got a little mad ..She felt so bad,but she was making sure Tony was ok since he was so small.She had maureen help my twin and i and my other 2 brothers..

Grandma would share so many stories about her kids and grandkids and all my cousins and etc from family parties,to games,to golfing,to gettogethers,walking/or biking to her house.Always was feeling the love and joy from all of us.The tricks Uncle Gerald would play or leave something in our beds when we visit like an arm or something.She knew it was going to happen and would laugh  our faces..Watching America’s home videos at Aunt June and Uncle Geralds house ,having icecream socials,going to plays,boyscouts and etc..Anything she was able to do Grandma did it.She would always ask how things was when there was something great going on and wasn’t able to attend (those that lived away from her).She was very serving and loving and when you stayed at her house she would make her famous english muffins and eggs or something like that.She didn’t care to come up and give you a hug and ask you whats wrong..She listened to you or watched you peformed in music whether it was plays,singing,violin,karoke,choir or w/e..watched you play sports and etc..Would always make sure you felt her love whether you were her own child,grandchild,great grandchild or w/e.

Grandma enjoyed the get togethers at her place, or going out to eat (as some took her for her bday on the bull)She talked about that last year.She talked about her kids and their father allen about golfing,and tennis and how they met their spouses..How funny Uncle bob is ..’He sure is a character ” she would say..Or “that Tom sure knows how to  cut your hair and make you look good” Its about time i get my hair done again she would say.Or with Uncle Joel,’He is the quiet one but really smart,he always has a good heart”She would say Aunt June was always talented in music and did you see how she makes those cards on the computer??so talented.As for my mom,, She would say “Anne sure married a good man to have all you kids..She sure has the love.You know she taught school and learned all about  children.”she has a good heart and i love my kids dearly..They all bring something good and i see it in all of you.Grandma would always say something about someone to me through our phonecalls or when i seen her.When i would update her about charity,or charlie or tommy or jeff, michael,allen,maureen,marylynn,liz, carolyn,jon,tony or myself it was always a sigh of relief we were all well.She would talk about the surfing boys,or the hair cutting girls,gymanstic,writing,painting, doctors ,music, whatever our talents were.Grandma is just the best and caring and so supportive.

No matter what there are always stories and memories that she shared ,some more than others depends on how often you got to see her.But she didn’t care..she loved all of us ,she loved her children so much and always when i called would ask ‘how is anne??she feeling alright?how’s your dad?is he still climbing mountains..she would tell me that she wanted me to find someone in the church and go to the temple and i have found that someone.I know she will be with me in spirit ,she wanted so much for me to be happy and enjoy the life my brothers and sisters have as having a family and someone that loved them ..It was not only my faith but also the love from my grandma,the care and support she gave me all my life and im forever grateful.I loved when she said when you find that person you tell them “you be nice to me,i will be nice to you” and you love them.she said that works and im forever grateful for the time i did see,hear,and hug her .I love you grandma ! So very much, i figure this would be the best way to share how much,and help my feelings and to show everyone else how much you love them..

I know you returned home and you will await to see all of us again! I am grateful for the gospel and to be able to go into the temple and be sealed for all eternity to my love of my life as well so one day we all can return and be a family together forever.And i know i will try to show my love for my family more and call upon them and write them more as i did you.You are a great example and I hope we all can do the same of being a close family and helping one another as you so taught us.LOVE YOU ALWAYS AND FOREVER GRANDMA YOU ARE THE BEST AND ALWAYS WILL BE AND GIVE OUR LOVE TO EVERYONE THERE OKAY??? πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ I AM SO GRATEFUL TO HAVE SHARED SO MUCH MEMORIES WITH YOU..YOU WILL BE MISSED BUT WON’T BE FORGOTTEN AND YOU WILL ALWAYS BE LOVED AND IN OUR HEARTS AND MIND FOREVER..TILL WE MEET AGAIN SWEET GRANDMA ..

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