MONDAY THOUGHTS~FAVORITISM 🙁

Happy Week Everyone. Each day I’m getting strength back. I feel it’s going to be a long week . Even though I’m still taking it easy. I’ve still got awhile to be healed and hope the fusion is taking. I have quite a bit of pain in my upper back/neck/shoulders etc. Sometimes it’s pulsating and that really hurts. Still in my right arm and hand goes numb and cold. Yet, I still manage to smile. I’m grateful.   Hubby went back to work . And I’m back at trying to get things in order. Thursday is my follow up appointment.  So I’ll be happy to see how far I’ve come in 2 weeks since surgery. In meantime I wanted to write what’s been weighing on my heart. 

Favoritism. To me I dislike. I’m not talking about music,actors, talents etc.. I’m talking about with family and friends . I’ve seen it all my life. Through my own family growing up to present. It’s all around whether in your own house,schools,church etc. We all have people we just love and adore. Yet there are many that are stuck on the sidelines. Some that never experience an outing,shopping spree,date,marriage,babyshower,hug,makeover,sleepover,etc. I see it in my own family.We all have our “favorites”.  I can just clearly see where all the attention goes too. Same in school ,church,and work. Always seeing the same groups together. Seeing same family members. Always doing same thing with same people and never including others. Or better yet do we even try to include “the outcast”. Do we figure out suggestions or offer to help of others struggling  and feel the need that everyone belongs to whatever you are doing ? That they should have that same time together ?.More like meeting somewhere others can go too. Whether it is closer due to finances,health or whatever. You know making adjustments.  It’s not always about how you can benefit or how easy it is for you or those around you. Sometimes it’s best to see how it would help or benefit someone else. Make sense?

When I flip threw photos or go places whether it’s a family or friend or church function, you would be amazed how many times I say to myself “I wonder if she/he gets to do that or this with them”. ” i wonder why no one asks him or her”. I wonder why I didn’t have my dad or mom do that for me. Or why I didn’t get that or why didn’t this happen for me,for them. Why does it seem like parents love them more? Why is it always on that side of state then here? How come no one let her sing? Or let him play? When they had kids or health issues how come no one checked on them? When they graduated they all got this but that person was left out. You can ask and try to answer so many things. But in all reality instead of why,  Just do?

You begin to question in your own Life, are you showing favoritism to the wrong people? Are you not being noticed? Will someone ever include you? Are you of importance? Do you show you care? Are you truly supporting others in their talent? Can you include more than just the normal friends in a project? Have you messaged someone new? Or someone you haven’t in awhile? Just some of these questions go in your mind. Some may not even be for you. Just things you see or feel when you watch other families or others around you. 

As society do we just feel comfortable in our own lives ,groups, friends and families where we don’t want to change? Where we don’t want others to experience? So many experiences in my life that I yearn so much for others to experience.  I love seeing others shine. That’s why I love all music. I love all cultures. And I try to learn of all things I can. My bucket list grows. But it means so much more when others are in that list. Why leave someone sitting alone ? Why not help pitch in to fly someone out? How about throwing a surprise party? A hug? A visit? A message? Paying a bill? A date? Shopping spree? Wiping tears? Donate a car? Pay someone that is behind you in store or wherever. If someone is hurting financially or struggling surprise with a check,gift cards, a getaway . Anything big or small because that person or persons never experienced.  Now I’m not meaning for you to go kiss everyone that hasn’t been kissed lol . Or max out your credit card .Or do something amazing and then forget about them. Should always continue to pay it forward.  In anyway you are able.  Feeding the homeless. Visiting someone not because it’s their birthday or holiday, just because. 

Is it that bad to invite the “nonpopular”,emotional,quiet, troublemaker along? These are important questions. Well for me anyways. Experiencing life is great despite the good and bad. What better way then to use some of your desires and energy and include others.  I don’t need to have my “favorites” to show I love someone. I don’t need to have the same peeps on an outing either. I’ve never been to a concert and always wanted to do a meet and greet. Well when the finances are not so tight, how bout I find someone that would love to do the same ? Just as wanting to go get a new outfit or try new place to shop,stay,or eat?Include. Include that stranger,friend, family member that normally doesn’t talk. Not because they are a “charity” case neither. I can’t speak for Anyone. But from experience I’m sure that would be the best thing anyone has done and that’s showing true interest,care and compassion. You can’t tell whats going on with someone but you can put yourself in their shoes. How can you make someone else feel wanted and needed? Ask yourself that an then act.

Next time you want to splurge and shop ,go find someone to do it with. I guarantee if you change it up with someone different or include someone else,the experience is amazing. Their face will light up. Anything you do and with good intentions,I’m telling you, favoritism will be obsolete.  Something more magical happens and you want to do it all the time . 

Why is it so easy for us to ignore those that we know and have known and it’s so easy to just push aside? Why is it so easy for us to continue enjoying life as if nothing was said on the matter? We all have hearts and desires. We have dreams and passions. Show the beauty in someone that doesn’t see it in themselves.  Let others feel the love they never experienced before.  Wipe the loneliness off of others and put a smile on their face. Let others embrace and love the moments they experience. 

I firmly believe that’s how many suffer emotionally, physically, and spiritually. We all want to be included. All want to be loved. We all want to experience sleepovers,girlnights,guysout,camping,trips,gettaways,reunions whatever the case may be. I can’t control what others do. Only can control how I would act and what I would say. I would say I’d try my best to include everyone. I would try and keep trying. No matter if it’s small like a care package to big like a car. Whether you make someone over to meeting your favorite singer or actress. Whether you walk together and talk ,to throwing a party just because.

I know we have our “go to”peeps. But some don’t. Some don’t experience the late talks. Or the visits. Some of us don’t experience trips,surprises,and group functions. Many don’t experience the father /daughter dance. Or the mother and son dance. Many don’t have families. Some don’t have jobs. Some don’t have clothes etc. Many don’t experience the home visits. Or get togethers for birthdays/holidays etc. Whatever the case may be, the list can go on and on. Don’t feel you have too. Don’t feel like it’s their own fault. You don’t have to share. You don’t have to do anything. It just makes life better if you choose too. Having charity. Being generous.  Sharing and loving are all choices . Up to each of us whether we do so.

It makes me want to do better. To include others. To welcome all I can in my life someway or somehow. Whether by a listen ,call,message,invite,visiting,or a meal. Whether support,a gift, a trip, a hug,a smile,a friend or etc 

We all get jealous. We’re not perfect. There may be things that some experienced that others want to. Some may be doing things you wish you could. That’s just fine. I believe in wishing and dreaming. Jealousy isn’t great. Especially when you have so much and others have so little. I certainly am Working on that.  I’m not afraid to admit I get jealous from family outings to not having a car or going to a concert,shopping spree,owning a home,etc..  how dumb is that? I can change my jelousness to gratefulness. I can change it to desires or wishes. But how many are looking at me and wishing what I have? HELLO? MANY . I have been given so much. I know many want the same. So all that energy of wasting on not having this or wanting this. We can sure turn to giving to others . Agree? 😁 I have all I need. Why not help others experience the same?

 In the meantime, how about including and loving. Not just for attention either. Not just for the “fame”. To include because you don’t want someone else being left behind. We’re all gods children.  For I believe that. And I don’t want anyone to feel left out. I want others to smile,be uplifted,noticed and included. It’s the experience. Every female to feel special and beautiful.  Every male to feel handsome and worthy. Every person to feel needed and wanted. To feel amazing and talented.  The feelings that others can have and the emotions they feel when doing something for the first time. It’s the best feeling in the world to do for others. Our savior did for us. And God sure is doing that daily.

Whether in my own family or extended. Whether in the church or school. Whether at work or at home. Whether in public or not. Always give and do for others  I’m guilty of not doing that too. And being jealous. And it’s not right. I was feeling sad about certain things and comparing how this person or that person did this and that and I didn’t get too. Or family always does things with the same members because some of us can’t do it and you feel excluded. Or some peeps get invited to party’s or school functions etc and others are left alone. You get the idea?

It’s sad I know. It doesn’t have to be. I’m not saying that you have to include everyone you see in your life. I’m not saying you have to do anything. After All these are my thoughts and how I feel. I am merely just suggesting that it’s becoming more of an issue daily. And I just want everyone to feel included and experience life . Especially things they so desire. And that we are truly blessed. We’re all worth it. We all can shine in our talents. No one is better,more popular or worth more than the other. We all are priceless. It’s up to us to show how worthy we are. I try to like and support all I can in life and in social media. I want to not have only “my favorites” or the most popular actor/actress/ musician/artist etc on my list. We’re all humans and we all shine so I want to support all I can. Forget popularity and favoritism. I have my favorites for sure but I wouldnt want to put them always before anyone else. Everyone deserves to be noticed and cared and recognized and appreciated.

Lean on each other. Experience life together. Include others and above all love each other. Or try 🤗 ! So much to experience and it can even be such a small gesture that can make someone else gleam. You be surprised how little or big you make it ,how that experience for someone turns their heart and their self esteem to much higher and better themselves. Keep shining and inspiring and helping and including all you can. Make someone’s dream,wishes,desires to come true.  Believe in yourself too. 

All the best ~Jackie ❤

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